Keep On Keepin' On

We have officially been in San Diego for three months now! To say it is all that we imagined would be a complete lie. We have had a fairly difficult time since we have been here. Don't get me wrong it is beautiful and amazing and we have had an amazing time however, some unexpected small tragedies have held us back a little... Okay, A LOT!

So, our big move went pretty well. We were of course completely unprepared and ended up leaving like eight hours after we were suppose to however, all was fine and we got here in one piece on time.

We had a little trouble finding a place to live but, ended up with an AMAZING apartment in a little island town called Coronado. Coronado is quite possibly the most picture perfect little town you will ever come across. It is about seventy percent Navy families and another good portion retired couples. It is one of those towns where everyone seems to know everyone and you can ride your bike to get absolutely everywhere you need to go. We live right on the boardwalk which surrounds the bay between us and San Diego. There are several little shops and cute little cafe type restaurants just a short walk down the boardwalk.

Living in Coronado has really made me excited to start our family. Riding our bikes to the beach one night I found myself lost in daydreams about what our children would be like growing up in Coronado. As we rode along the otherwise quite streets I could here children laughing and jumping on a trampoline in a back yard close by. There was a group of children playing hide N seek running between the houses and across the streets. it was quite literally perfection.

We did quite a bit of exploring and lounging around the first few weeks we were here and then we got adventurous and decided to try surfing...

This is were it got complicated. While surfing, I was hit by a falling sail on a sail boat and knocked off of my board. Ben took care of me that night and we made an appointment for an orthopedic surgeon the next day.

After my X-Rays and MRI we nervously waited for the doctor's results. He was shaking his head as he walked in the room with the X-Rays. As he inserted them onto that nifty little wall lamp surgeons have he laughed and said, "Well you sure did it up right!" He even proceeded to show off my X-Rays to his partners as they all said, "Wow", and "OH, cool", and "How the Heck.."

Yep, I did it up right, alright! I had shattered my knee and split my tibia, vertically, right down the center. Apparently an old injury from high school never quite healed correctly and helped this new injury right along into catastrophic territory.

Two weeks later I had surgery to repair my knee and leg and was prescribed bed rest for the next six to eight weeks... This I can tell you has not been fun in the least bit! To top it all off, while I was in the waiting room waiting to go in for surgery I got an e-mail offering me a job that, because of the bed rest, I was not able to take.

Ben has been pretty amazing and has stepped up doing the laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, cleaning and taking care of me but it has been extremely hard, for me and for him. I am grumpy most of the time because I have been stuck in four walls for almost two months now and he is grumpy because he is tired and way overworked.

Last week, we are pretty sure that I had a miscarriage, even though we did not know I was even pregnant. It was really strange for me. On one hand I felt a little devastated but on the other I felt relief and lucky because we certainly did not need me to be pregnant on crutches. Also, with all of the X-Rays lately I would have been extremely worried throughout our first child's entire pregnancy and most of their childhood due to all of the terrible complications and cancer risks that come with X-Ray exposure in the first trimester. We have told ourselves that everything will be fine and our time for a family will come soon but, it is all just so disappointing. We just always seem to get knocked down just as we are standing back up.

We have muddled through and it is getting much better. We always pick ourselves up and dust ourselves off and keep on keeping on...

This weekend Ben's parents came to visit. We rented a wheelchair and I got to go out, without going to the doctor, for the first time in two months. We took them to the Cliff Hanger Cafe for lunch and to watch the gliders and hung out by the fire at their hotel next door to us. We had dinner on the boardwalk and took in the Miramar Air Show in San Diego. All in all it was a great weekend.

Next weekend my KO is coming to visit. I am super excited to see her! We are sure to have a blast and she always knows how to raise my spirits.

So, right now we are trucking our way out of a valley but we are sure to find a new and undiscovered peak soon. Three more months in San Diego and then we are off to San Francisco for six months of new adventures!

We're Moving to San Diego!

When Ben graduated we decided that he would work for two years in the Emergency Department and then apply for a position as an agency nurse for a traveling agency.

We quickly began to dream of all of the places we would one day be able to say we had not only traveled to but LIVED in. You know like, "Oh that was during our Cali days." or "We use to have raging parties at our little beach house in Hawaii!" or "Oh yes, Boston, is beautiful in Summer." or "The BEST crab legs I have ever had were from that little market down the street from our condo in Seattle!" And ON, And ON with our shameless bragging on how worldly we are.

SO, suddenly it's two years later and it's time to begin our grand adventure!

Our entire family thinks we have lost our minds.  All of our friends are saying, "BUT WHAT ABOUT YOUR HOUSE??" Everyone has heard us talk of our grand travels for years now but, apparently they never really thought we would do it.

I truly do love it when I can surprise the heck out of everyone and do just what I say I am going to!  One of the best memories I have is of my brother teasing me. "Oh, Lori, you will NEVER move to Chicago all ALONE. Get real, little sister!" One month later my new gay boyfriend and I were decorating my fabulous new apartment on Lake Michigan.

Being a gypsy actually comes quite naturally for me, hopping around from one place to another.  There is nothing quite like that feeling of a new and undiscovered place. Everything seems so big and adventurous.  The feeling of walking down Michigan Ave. for the first time alone with head phones playing my favorite tunes.

The feeling of roller blading down Ocean Beach for the first time is sure to be my best experience yet!! The cherry on the top is that this new experience will be shared with My Favorite!! Three Cheers for San Diego July, 23 2012!!!

I have a secret...

and it is a BIG one!!!!!!! OMG! I am going to POP!!

Hint #1

Hint # 2

We All Carry On

As life goes on these days I find that Keep Calm and Carry On has become my mantra.  Life has it's peaks and valleys its ebb and flow and all we can do is just carry on.

Ben and I had hoped that our life would be taking a very different direction this June in many ways but here we are in June and we are still just wishing and waiting.

Some licensing issues have put our biggest change on hold and another sizable change just does not seem to be happening for us which really is not the end of the world but does seem to be an irrational fear coming to life.

When I look at our stumbles however, I do realize just how lucky we are to have such small struggles in life.  Yes, we have had to put plans on hold and yes we will have to endure things that we wish we did not have to for just a little longer but, we have it pretty good.

We both have well paying jobs.  We have family that loves us.  We have friends to eat mexican or have pizza and beer or sit at Fast Eddies with.  We have amazing neighbors to have porch parties with on two minutes notice. We have nieces and nephews to fill up our hearts and our sweet little puppy girls to play and cuddle with.

We do not have to worry about the intrusive or ridiculous comments every family member or random person on the street has to say about the way we are handling a divorce.  We do not have to worry about what people think about us still having lunch together and taking our children on vacation together but not actually being "together".  We do not have to decide whether or not to have a "sit down conversation" with our toddler about why Daddy does not live with us anymore.

We do not have learn how to steer in a new life where life changes have taken you in a direction where you are suddenly a single working mom instead of a married stay at home mom.  We do not have to worry what people will think if we share a meal or a drink with another man or woman; What people will think if we take a vacation alone on our ex-spouses weekend with the kids.

We are in good health and do not have to worry about where the money will come from while one of us is on sick leave without pay.  We do not have to worry about our spouse as we realize that they may be going back down a road of mental instability.

We are strong.  We are happy in our relationship.  We are content for now in our daily life though we may still be dreaming of what it will be like in the next few months but we will carry on!

Here's to two lines in Cali August 2012!!

Untitled New Year Post

So, I just found this while going through old posts.  In full Lo style it is unfinished and was never published.  Ya know, sometimes time just gets away from us and life just gets in the way.  Nonetheless, I love the unfinished story that I began here and I just had to publish it unfinished or not.  Better late than never!!

Also, it made me smile and made me think of my beautiful S-I-L and how much fun we have together.  I love you so much, Ash; no matter where life takes us in the next few months, you will always be my sister!

January, 2011

My 27 year...

It is hard to find the words to describe this year.  It was great, terrible, terrific, horrible, scary, filled with love, filled with fear, amazing, memorable, the best, the worst, and the greatest.  It was life in it's purist form.

So much in my life has changed this year and it makes me remember my fourteenth and fifteenth year...  How much stronger I am now.  How much wiser than I was then.  Things that would have made me  falter an fall...  Those things did not break me in my twenty-seventh year. I have picked myself up and dusted myself off and started over again.

My year began in a Hotel bathroom in Louisville, Kentucky peeing on a stick with my sister-in-law.  I knew, I, was not pregnant but sometimes you just do silly things with your girlfriends.  I did make her pee her pants by pointing out Barbie's compromising position in the movie theatre parking lot, so I guess you could say I owed her.  She SWORE that it was JUST for FUN!

Nine months later...  We welcomed Eden Reese McPherson to the family. 

     

Just for FUN, huh!

...

Reading List

For some reason, I have had this sudden explosion in my reading habits.  There are just so many good books that I want to read that I have been reading them all at once.  At the moment I am very into three very different books.

Bloom, by Kelle Hampton -
Kelle's first person story of her life and the new life she is sharing with her beautiful daughters Lainey and Nella. (Nella has a very special extra chromosome known as Down Syndrome)

Bringing Up Bebe, by Pamela Druckerman -
Pamela's very witty first person account on what it is like raising an American baby in France and why, she believes, French babies don't throw food!

Fifty Shades of Grey, by E L James -
Ummm... Pure and utter dirty, dirty, raunchy, filth... In the good way!! My S-I-L calls it (MSP) Mommy Soft Porn.

And I just started sobbing while reading the prologue to this so, I guess I found one of my next three books to read at the same time

Happy Mothers Day

“First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.

May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.

When the Crystal Meth is offered, May she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer.

Guide her, protect her
When crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age.

Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels.
What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.

Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen. Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait.

O Lord, break the Internet forever, That she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.
And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.

And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back.

“My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes.”

- TINA FEY- BOSSY PANTS 

SO Deserving

One of my girlfriends from high school had the most amazing thing happen to her the other day. This is so inspiring and amazing to me! There really are some beautiful women in this world!

http://benseyleb.blogspot.com/2012/03/defending-silver-lining-part-2.html

Congratulations and good luck, Miss Andrea. You are so very deserving of all of the love that is pouring over you!

Hi...

Yep, I'm still here... Still hangin on.

"May the blessed badass that dwells within you deliver when you need her most. Amen." ~ Kelle Hampton

Yep, I am still here and my blessed badass is about to break free and do some cartwheels... She's comin, you just wait!! 

Until then, check out the most beautiful little girls in my life!!

Sister knows how to get her silly on

This, right here, is her "scary face"

Sister also knows how to get her sassy on 

And she is always a beauty

Who??? Me??? 

She looks like such a BIG girl!!

We can't forget the REESER!! 

Hey, Hey YOU!! That's my bahbah mook!! 

Ummm... I don't understand??!! You want me to what, Aunt Lo??